I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
So apparently I’m into choking now
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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