Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
time to smoke my breakfast
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
