Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize
