Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Two words: blizzard sex
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Randomize