at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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