It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
