That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
