sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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