I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
