I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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