Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
