I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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