3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
