THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
