I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.