dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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