I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
