I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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