Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
