My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
