Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
