my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
