Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk

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  (612): How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk http://tfl.nu/wp9g
  Replies (7) Good night (1001) Bad night (3502)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.

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  (636): It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy. http://tfl.nu/hnmj
  Replies (17) Good night (603) Bad night (3022)
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  (949): View more from California

  even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that

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  (949): even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that http://tfl.nu/ftma
  Replies (29) Good night (605) Bad night (4429)
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  (323): View more from California

  She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.

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  (323): She really thought E.D. was a sexually position. http://tfl.nu/ymfw
  Replies (14) Good night (524) Bad night (3618)
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  (858): View more from California

  There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.

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  (858): There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate. http://tfl.nu/dn5m
  Replies (24) Good night (7545) Bad night (983)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?

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  (609): why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures? http://tfl.nu/ty0v
  Replies (6) Good night (2103) Bad night (1060)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.

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  (306): I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car. http://tfl.nu/2mw2
  Replies (15) Good night (5752) Bad night (1183)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.

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  (617): did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now. http://tfl.nu/raep
  Replies (4) Good night (1600) Bad night (922)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.

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  (813): she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by. http://tfl.nu/df84
  Replies (5) Good night (1368) Bad night (1078)
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  (845): View more from New York

  No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown

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  (845): No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown http://tfl.nu/5hg1
  Replies (6) Good night (2075) Bad night (1064)
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  (914): View more from New York

  He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.

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  (914): He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game. http://tfl.nu/uv06
  Replies (2) Good night (1461) Bad night (622)
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  (631): View more from New York

  I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?

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  (631): I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend? http://tfl.nu/hi71
  Replies (3) Good night (1199) Bad night (645)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.

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  (660): What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food. http://tfl.nu/k4pm
  Replies (10) Good night (1167) Bad night (445)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there

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  (801): Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there http://tfl.nu/7057
  Replies (3) Good night (477) Bad night (318)
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  (310): View more from California

  My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'

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  (310): My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding' http://tfl.nu/2vdw
  Replies (2) Good night (1075) Bad night (272)

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