I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
