Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
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In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
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I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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