Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
