You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
