I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
