literally had 100 drinks last night.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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