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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.

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• (518): View more from New York

  It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.

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• (619): View more from California

  I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.

  (619): View more from California

  .... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.

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