i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize
