You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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