This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
My ass is underappreciated
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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