I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
