How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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