Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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