Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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