girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
