So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
