there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
