I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize