I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
