At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
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