That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize
