We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
