the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Can Purell be used as lube?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
When are your genitals available?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
