looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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