can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
