I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
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