We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
