I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
